I have written about traits to have in your friends that will bring you joy, ways to combat obstacles within those friendships, and even when to let them go their own way. This will be a bit more personal, so please be honest with yourself and have a notepad nearby to jot down qualities you want in your mate.
We all should have read or heard the following question sometime in our life: “What characteristics would I like to have in my ideal mate?” But, as society would ask us, ‘doesn’t this cause us to become so selective that we miss out on the opportunities right in front of us?’ Let us see if society has this right or if our God has any wisdom on the matter.
EDIT: Some people have brought it to my attention that not only did I forget to include a description of one of the points, but I was not clear on the purpose of this ‘list’, so this will (hopefully) be my only edit.
Characteristics for starting a general romantic relationship/friendship between male and female[Take that!] (Item in Blue Text), already in a lasting friendship or even in a romantic relationship that potentially could lead to marriage (Item in Green Text), and inside a marriage/very close to marriage (Item in Red Text). These characteristics are not required in these specific areas of relationship, but are a general thought of when they should be developing.
1. Has a Compatible Sense of Humor
2. Is Physically Attractive
3. Has a Good Sense of Self
4. Leans on Christ Whole-Heartedly
5. Respects People
6. Has Good Genetics
7. Can be Patient in Most Things
8. Able to Take Responsibility for Actions Fairly Easily
9. Fights Semi-Fairly/Controls Temper
10. Openly Communicates/Open-Minded
11. Is at a Similar Place in Her Life
12. Is Okay with Economic Times
13. More Self-less than Self-ish
14. Shares the Same Spiritual Convictions
15. Is Optimistic and Hopeful
16. Is a Virgin
17. Loves to Worship
18. Helps me to be a Better Man
19. Loves me Forever
1. Sense of Humor
What makes a person worth hanging around for long periods of time? Besides their haunting good looks, their ability to find the funny in life can make it or break it for most people.
According to E-Harmony, humor is just another factor that can either continue to benefit and grow the relationship, or it can drive an already faltering couple to the brink of destruction.
2. Physically Attractive
Did you see that great looking person? Wow! They would put a forest fire to shame!
We have all seen and know those that can seemingly take the oxygen away from our lungs, but to some, this is the most important trait to any romantic relationship there is.
Most guys must be physically attracted to a female before any other characteristics are even thought about. This does not necessarily mean that all women must look ‘like supermodels’, but simply be attractive in their own way.
This goes similarly for women but not nearly as important as men. From the research I have done (sources provided upon request), women value personality and other factors above physical attractiveness; however, they still value physical attractiveness fairly highly on their qualities to look for. This may have something to do with woman’s innate ability to have an open mind towards many people.
How well do you know yourself? Can you identify your strengths and your weaknesses? It has taken me about 10 years to figure this out myself (I know, I’m a late bloomer!), but I have overcome most of my weaknesses through my relationship with Christ.
For you guys (and girls), it may take you less time to ‘find yourselves’. I hope that you can do this through Christ, where I actually tried to locate ‘me’ within society. This wasted much much time that I could have spent doing much better things, but I am where I need to be because of it. Those issues I still struggle with are slowing losing their connection to me, but I can say I know myself because of my relationship with Him is stronger than ever, and I see His influence daily.